Episode 3: Coming forward to marriage
In the name of Allah the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
O young people! Come on! Come forward to marriage!
1-On the authority of Ibn Mas’ood, may Allah be pleased with him, he said: the messenger of Allah, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said: (O young men! Whoever among you can afford to get married, let him do so, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and preserving the chastity. Whoever cannot afford it, let him fast, for that will be a shield for him”. [Narrated by Bukhari: Statement 5065-9/112, with Fat’h Al-Baari, and Muslim: Statement 1400]. There is in this Statement incitement on marriage and desirability to do so. It is a Tradition of prophets and messengers. Nowadays, many young men and women turned away from marriage in belittlement to its importance and disregard to its virtue.
During the course of these lines, we will shed light on people’s circumstances in marriage, which are in three categories:
The first one: Among them is he on whom marriage is an obligation. It is him who fears for himself from falling into an unlawful act if he forsakes marriage. This one must chastise himself and safeguard it from prohibitions. His way out is marriage, which is what the majority of jurists say.
The second one: the one on whom marriage is desirable. It is him who has a desire but can keep away from falling into an unlawful act. For this one, he’d be better off considering it (marriage) more than being dedicated to performing acts of voluntary worship, which is apparently what the Companions, may Allah be pleased with them, said and did.
Ibn Mas’ood said: “If only ten days of term remain, and I know that I will die on the last day, and that I still can afford the dowry for their marriage, I would marry from fear of temptation”.
Ibrahim ibn Maisarah said: Tawos said to me: “you either get married or I will say to you what Omar said to Abu Zawa’id: Nothing is preventing you from marriage except incapacity or immorality.
Ahmed, may Allah have mercy on him, said in Marrawedhi’s narration: To remain a bachelor is not a prescript of Islam, in anything.
This is a strong incitement to marriage and a threat to leaving it that makes it closer to obligation.
Marriage has many advantages, among it: consolidation of the religion and its, chastity of the woman, her protection and maintenance, bearing offspring, increasing the nation, realization of the pride of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, and other benefits.
Therefore, take the initiative, brother and sister, by accepting the good husband or wife, because delay is a contravention of the Sunnah and can lead to falling into forbidden acts.
The third category: The one who has no desire; either he was not created with a desire, like the impotents or has a desire but lost it due to old age, sickness, etc…
There are two opinions therein:
For one of them: marriage is desirable for the above mentioned reasons, and for the second, to leave it out is preferable, because he would not reap the benefits of marriage, would prevent his wife from achieving chastity from other than him. He would harm her, confine her from himself and expose himself to duties and rights, which he may not be able to carry out. He would be preoccupied from knowledge and worship, by what is of no benefit to him, and the news carry about concerning the one who has a desire, due to the evidence that gives indications about it.
By: Miss Basimah Badr Al Jaabiri
Masters of Comparative Jurisprudence