Third, looking at good qualities and overlooking the bad ones:

Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: "A believer must not hate a believing woman (his wife). If he dislikes one aspect of her character, he will be pleased with another." (1)

So, it is not permissible for a husband to hate his wife if he sees something he dislikes because if he dislikes one aspect of her character, he will be pleased with another; thus the good quality is for the bad quality.

No doubt that thinking of good qualities which draw nearer both spouses is the straight way to happiness because perfection is rare and all women have defects as it is the case for men.

However, the soundness of religion is the greatest winning and blessing and the rest is easy. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Seize the opportunity by marrying the religious one."

Finally, Shu`ayb ibn Harb wanted to marry a woman, so he said to her: I am of bad manners. She said: The one who pushed you to be of bad manners is worse. Thereupon he said: Then you shall be my wife. (2)


(1) Reported by Muslim in the chapter on recommendation in regard to women Hadith No. 3721 - 4/178.

(2) Ahkam An-Nsa' P. 82.


#1 Episode 44: The system of Islam in avoiding marital problems and solving them (3 - 6)Jada 5 Jumada al-Thani 1439 AH
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