Proprieties of marriage (2 - 8)
Declaring marriage and beating with the Duff (a tambourine-like instrument without bells):
It is desirable to declare marriage and beating with tabor. Muhammad ibn Hatib Al Jumahy narrated that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: "The division between the lawful and the unlawful lies in the daff (tambourine) and the voice [i.e., the announcement)." (1)`A'ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) narrated that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: "Publicize these marriages, conduct them in masjids, and beat the dufuf (tambourines) to announce them."(2) As-San`any said: The Hadiths referred to the command with declaring marriage and beating tabors provided that it is not accompanied by prohibited things such as sinning by a female singer who sings about women's bodies and descriptions. People should follow the Sunnah of the Prophet (peace be upon him) in this regard because they are commanded to follow him in everything. It is not true that as long as beating tabors these days is connected with many prohibited matters, so it is prohibited.
Of the examples of the poetry which is valid to be sung is what was reported from the Prophet (peace be upon him) that he asked `A'ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) about the poetry which the Ansar (the Supporters) sang when she accompanied them in one of the wedding ceremonies: Did you send a slave girl to beat the tabor and sing for her? `A'ishah asked: What should she say? The Prophet said: She should say: Here we come! Here we come! So, welcome you and us. Had it been for the gold you paid [as dower], she would not have gone to your homes. Had it been for the black wheat, your virgins would not have become mature. (3) There is a huge difference between the pure and chaste singing which the Prophet (peace be upon him) indicated and between the words which people these days sing besides the prohibited instruments, so Allah is the One whose aid is to be implored. (4)
(1) Reported by At-Tirmidhy in the book of marriage, chapter on declaring marriage, Hadith No. 1094 2/275 and said: A good Hadith, it was also reported by An-Nasa'y in the book of marriage, chapter on declaring marriage by voice [singing] Hadith No. 3369 6/127, Ibn Majah in the book of marriage, chapter on declaring marriage, Hadith No. 1896 1/611, and reported by Ahmad 3/418; Al Albany graded this Hadith as good in the proprieties of marriage.
(2) Reported by At-Tirmidhy in the book of marriage, chapter on declaring marriage, Hadith No. 1095 2/276. At-Tirmidhy said: This Hadith is Hassan Gharib (a good Hadith that is strange to come from this chain of narration). Eisa ibn Maymun Al Ansary (the narrator) makes the Hadith weak. However, Eisa who reported Hadiths from Ibn Najih is trustworthy. The Hadith was also reported by Ibn Majah in the book of marriage, chapter on publicizing marriage Hadith No. 1895 1/611, and reported by Al Bayhaqy in the book of marriage, chapter on things which should be declared in marriage 7/290, However, the Hadith is weak as Ibn Hajar said in Fathul-Bary 6/226. It was reported in At-Talkhis (2122) Al Albany mentioned the same narration in Irwa' Al Ghalil Hadith No. 1993 7/50 and As-Silsilah Ad-Da`ifah Hadith No. 978, 2/409. It was also reported by At-Tirmidhy in the book of marriage, chapter on declaring marriage Hadith No. 1095 but the Hadith can be classified as good by its similar Hadiths, see Irwa' Al Ghalil 7/50.
(3) Reported by At-Tabarany Hadith No. 3265-3/315.
(4) See: Subul As-Salam 3/249, Fath Al Bary 9/226, and Al Mughny 6/537.