Episode 43: The system of Islam in avoiding marital problems and solving them (2 - 6)

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Second, reminding the people with the expected goodness and the good final destination:

Allah (Glory be to Him) says: "And live with them honorably. If you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing and Allâh brings through it a great deal of good." (1) i.e., if you hate them because of ugliness or bad manner without committing an adultery or Nushuz (the state when one spouse violates their marital duties); this is a probability, so perhaps Allah would grant him righteous children from her.

Ibn `Abbas said: Perhaps Allah would grant him a child and that child would be righteous.

Makhul said: I heard Ibn `Umar saying: A man asks Allah to choose for him and Allah (may He be Exalted) chooses for him, he refuses the choice of his Lord (Glory be to Him) but sooner he will figure out that the choice was good. (2)

This is seen a lot in reality; how many men hated their wives then kept them and observed patience and they were good aid to them in regard of religion and worldly affairs or were given righteous children from them.

Scholar Ibn Al Jawzy (may Allah bestow mercy on his soul) said: The Ayah exhorted to keeping the wife despite her husband's hatred to her and drew the attentions to two meanings; one of them is that man does not know where goodness is, so a reprehensible matter may be praised and vice-versa. The second is that man can barely find someone who does not have any defect, so he should observe patience to have what he loves; therefore people confirmed this meaning with the following verses:

Whoever does not close his eyes in order not to see the defects of his friend shall die while having doubt in his heart from him.

Whoever follows every defect he finds shall not have a friend all lifelong. (3)

                      

_________________

(1) Surat An-Nisa': 19.

(2) see Al Jami` Fi Ahkam Al Qur'an of Al-Qurtuby 5/98 and Zad Al Masir 2/42.

(3) Zad Al Masir 2/42.

 

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